The Story Store
by ArenLuxon
Summary: If stories were sold in a shop, and Ichibumi Ichiei walked into that store to order Highschool DxD, it would probably look a little like this.


"One tsundere please, easy on the tsun."

"Certainly, sir."

Ichiei sighed. Only one more customer in front of him.

The blonde lady comes back with a girl.

"This is our most recent model. Is she a major character?"

"No. Just an unimportant side character."

"So no options? Generic design, no backstory?"

"Yeah."

"Here you go then. That'll be 500 Ipsun."

The man takes out some gold coins and pays for the character.

Finally it's Ichiei's turn.

There is no one behind him, the entire store is empty.

Ichiei walks up to the counter.

"I would like to order a story."

"Certainly sir. What genre would you like?"

"Do you have a catalog?"

"Certainly."

The shopkeeper hands him a thick book.

"Let's see," Ichiei says browsing through the book. "I would like ecchi, harem, action, romance, fantasy and comedy."

"All of those?" the lady looks a bit startled.

"Yeah, why not?"

"Uhm. Yeah. That's certainly an option.

Would you like a shounen or a seinen?"

"Both."

"Sir?"

"On the surface, I want an easy story but with deeper messages hidden slightly under the surface."

"... Certainly sir, if that is your wish.

What kind of MC would you like? Unfortunately, we only have boys available."

"That's fine. I would like a perverted MC."

"That is very unusual. In a harem setting, we tend to place a standard dense, stupid-"

"Oh no, that sounds extremely boring. No no. I want a slightly traumatized boy who enjoys ecchi situations but is unsure when they develop into something serious. And make him ambitious and a hard worker."

"Should he have a life goal?"

"Having his own harem. Oh, and make sure he always jumps head first into fights to protect his friends. Otherwise, girls wouldn't like him."

"Sir. You don't need to have a reason. If you say the girls like him, they will, even is he's an asshole."

"What kind of crap stories do you people sell?"

"You asked for a harem."

"Yes, but I want a serious approach of the genre."

"So, no fanservice?"

"No no. Loads of it. And don't bother to find a reason, just throw it in whatever you like."

"Sir. I hope you realize people can't just start broadcasting anything. This is starting to turn into a hentai. If that is what you want I could…"

"No. Look. Just boobs okay?"

"Seems fine."

"So what else?"

"Let's see." the woman checks her screen. "Other characters? How large do you want your harem?"

"Let's see. About seven seems fine? I can add more later on."

"I see. So we introduce them all in episode one…"

"What? No. Why would you do that?"

"Well, there's no time. Harems get cancelled after twelve episodes you know."

"Maybe that's why. No no. Introduce them slowly, start with like two of them. You can have some others present already, but don't make them part of the harem that early."

"As you wish. Would you like a preset cliche? We have the tsundere, the childhood friend, the little sister…"

"No thanks." What is wrong with these people? "I'll design them from scratch thank you very much."

"Exceptional for a harem. You're a weird costumer, you know."

"Maybe. I would also like a supporting male character. A bishounen."

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me. I want a bishounen."

"But sir. That doesn't make any sense. A harem lead shouldn't have any…"

"Listen to me, young lady. You will put in a bishounen, or I'll tell your boss you've been denying my request."

The girl swallows. "I apologize. A blonde one?"

"Seems fine."

"We're almost done." The both of them seem to be relieved. "All that's left is the plot.

We have a standard…"

"No thanks. I would like something else."

Ichiei takes out a book.

"I would like this, and this, and this,..."

Dragons, angels, demons, vampires, cat girls,... The girl is typing really fast. "Hold on. What was that last one?"

"Chichigami. Breast god."

"I see. Anything else you would like to throw in?" there is a hint of sarcasm in her voice.

"Well, I had this idea called Dress Break and…"

Definitely an annoying customer.

He went on and on until finally...

"What would you like to name your story? I would suggest something with _Highschool_."

"Yeah. Let's go with _Highschool DxD._ "

"I see. Well, then we're done."

The man paid and left the store.

The shopkeeper sighed, looking at the empty store.

 _One customer please, easy on the ambition._


End file.
